Thursday, September 16, 2010

And Now We Wait...

Well, It's been a long day and we're glad it's almost done. We've been both anxious for this day to come knowing it brings us one step closer to this ordeal being done, and also dreading it as we remember how it feels to be in a courtroom listening to this case being debated.  Sitting in court has a way of bringing the reality and the gravity of all of this front and center.  When we're at home, going about everyday life has a way of veiling the reality of the situation and making it manageable. We're able to be distracted, to laugh and to enjoy life. Even though the possibility of losing Wavy is ever present it's not front and center and even though certain things will bring it to the forefront we feel like this situation no longer rules our lives. Effects us and pains us yes, but it doesn't consume us or completely overwhelm us. This has to be the grace of God and the prayers of so many faithful people that have us in this place.

Today is different though. Today is a day where you know and accept that you're going to live in the full reality of what's happening. We're thankful that there aren't many days like today. While today was similar to the last time we were in court there were some clear differences as well. This morning rather than a 20 minute drive across town it was an hour drive to the state capital. An hour of anticipating how the morning would unfold. Would it go well? Would it be a disaster? Would we get any indication in the faces of the justices that would tip us off to how they felt? Would our attorney perform well? Would the birthfather's? It was one of the worst hours I've spent in the car. Walking into the courthouse was different as well. As we walked through the doors of the building there was statue 3 stories tall representing some particular facets of justice. I'm not sure what they were and honestly didn't care. I was just struck with the size of the statue which pretty much sums up how I felt about the rest of the court. Everything seemed much more sizable today. The courtroom itself was bigger. The justice's bench was larger in order to accommodate more than twice the amount of justices than the appellate court. Even their leather chairs seemed bigger. It was clear at at almost every turn that this was a bigger deal - the highest court in the state. Then it seemed almost unbelievable - unbelievable that we'd come this far. From the case being argued in a small district courtroom in downtown Olathe to the Kansas Supreme Court. For me, all of this added an extra dose of gravity to what was taking place in front of us in the courtroom.  For the proceeding each of the attorney's had 20 minutes to argue their cases which mostly amounted to them fielding questions from the justices. It was a long 40 minutes in which each attorney presented things he had presented before the other courts. I tried to stay engaged and listen attentively to all they said, but I found my mind wandering in and out. Two things struck me during the oral arguments. The first was that, despite the size of everything - the large courtroom, the bench, 7 justices - it seemed small, even tiny. The bigness of the building, the statue, the room, the 7 justices all seemed very small and God seemed very big. It was a clear reminder in my spirit of who really is presiding this case. God is just and is also sovereign and even though those 40 minutes in the courtroom were awful they were still under his control and he is good. Along with that I remembered a place in the Psalms where it says that "The law of the Lord is perfect..." I couldn't remember the rest, but that short phrase struck with me throughout the time we were sitting there. It ran over and over in my mind as I was sitting there looking at the seal of the state of Kansas hanging over the head of the Chief Justice - "The law of the Lord is perfect."

The 40 minutes eventually passed. It was over and there was a sense of relief that this might be the last time we sit in court. We had a short meeting with our attorney to get his take on things and then left. There was another thing different about court today. In the past we've booked it out of court and headed as quickly as we could to the car. Today we stopped on the front steps of the courthouse. My dad and mom joined us today as well as a friend of theirs from church and their pastor. It was totally unexpected that these other 2 men came to sit with us in court today and I can't really adequately express what that meant to us. We'll never forget that. So today, my dad's pastor Joel stopped us all on the steps and we prayed. Well, he prayed. Molly and I were really in no shape to. But standing there, gathered in a circle on the front steps of the Kansas Supreme Court the 6 of us prayed. That's when I remembered the rest of the passage in Psalms - "The law of the Lord is perfect, restoring the soul. The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy making wise the simple." I'm sure to anyone who saw us it probably looked "simple", but for us it's a powerful picture and one I hope we can look back on as closing the chapter on this journey.

This post is way longer than I intended it to be so thank you for reading this far and indulging us on this one. We thought it might be helpful to share a little about how today was. So where do things go from here? Well, we wait. It's a familiar place and I feel like we've gotten somewhat use to waiting on courts. There's no timetable for when the Supreme Court will hand down their decision, but we are praying for sooner rather than later. Similar to the Appeals Court, they hand their decisions on Friday's so we'll know on some Friday in the future what they've decided. 

Thank you all so much for your thoughts and prayers and support for our family along this journey. Please continue to pray that God will sustain us through whatever remains and that the Supreme Court will decide to keep Waverley in our family forever. 

Matt & Molly


Yia Yia said...

Love you both so, so much. This is a wonderful read, and thank you for being so transparent. You make this mother's heart happy. XOXOXO

Kristin said...

Thanks so much for sharing so much of this difficult day. Many prayers coming your way from Colorado!

Sonya said...

Was good to hear the trust and faith in God throughout your post. That is truly the only place that we can count on. Know that prayers continue to come your way.